In the days of my post-teenage years, I used to be one of those pesky bloggers out there, babbling about random thoughts, (what I thought were) neat things, events, and my lack of a love life. It's sad when I look back on the stuff I wrote about, though I do not regret writing them. Blogging was a means of expressing myself.
Years have passed since I blogged like that. Sadly, I stopped about the time Rayson was hit with brain cancer.
Only recently had I thought about searching through my old weblog, hoping I wrote something that I could share about my little brother with you all, and leave me with a warm memory. Disappointingly, those young adult years seem more about self-discovery, and the bulk of my entries, only mentioned him in passing.
"I had sushi with Rayson and..." [talk about the food]
"My brother dropped me off at the airport..." [talk about flight anxiety]
*sigh*
Then I came across one of those email surveys that your friends would send you. Used to love those. It was certainly a great way of writing about the latest hobbies and music you were into. Also a sad realization that you can't answer certain questions when it's never happened before...
Years have passed since I blogged like that. Sadly, I stopped about the time Rayson was hit with brain cancer.
Only recently had I thought about searching through my old weblog, hoping I wrote something that I could share about my little brother with you all, and leave me with a warm memory. Disappointingly, those young adult years seem more about self-discovery, and the bulk of my entries, only mentioned him in passing.
"I had sushi with Rayson and..." [talk about the food]
"My brother dropped me off at the airport..." [talk about flight anxiety]
*sigh*
Then I came across one of those email surveys that your friends would send you. Used to love those. It was certainly a great way of writing about the latest hobbies and music you were into. Also a sad realization that you can't answer certain questions when it's never happened before...
6. How old were you when you had your first kiss?
N/A
For good or for bad, I posted those surveys on my blog. And one entry -- dating back October 3, 2007 -- Rayson is mentioned more than once. [Don't expect deep insight. This is a email survey, after all.]
2. What’s the most exciting thing that happened to you today? | This might be a story I'll share for another day, because after reading about the incident, I found the blog entry for that particular concert. And I have photos too, but that's in my archives somewhere... [a link to the future blog entry here] |
3. Who are your closest friends? | Rayson has always been a close friend of mine, perhaps the closest. Not that we shared feelings, but more that he was always around without having to ask, someone I could go to events and meals with, have an understanding over each other's quirks, and share in various interests together. There's no one else that knew me in such an intimate level like he did; not just know but relate and share so much things in common. |
30. Who was the last person in your bedroom besides you? | Rayson and I lived with our parents. Perhaps in my teenage years I would always close the door and want privacy, but around college, I decided to leave an open door. And he'd casually wander in, whether to hang out or use the computer or whatnot. Miss those times... |
So there you have it. Hopefully my search through old blog entries will provide further insights about Rayson, but for now, I figure I'd share the most insightful thing in my old Xanga to-date.
BY PATRICK PU, BROTHER | Quoted entry: October 3, 2007 |